Monday, July 13, 2009

All that happened till I saw Gangster


“Where you been last night?”

Outburst of my father’s deep and “axel rose –ish” [For those who don’t know , Axel rose is the lead vocalist of the rock band Guns and Roses] voice was enough to shake me up, a boy who did not enjoy the facilities of a mobile phone during college days and had very little ideas about mutual and system generated responsibilities.

“Papa, I could not call you, all the stores were closed and I did not see anybody around me whom I knew, and my mental state was not conducive enough to think about anything that was beyond my consecutive failures” I replied with a face which can only be referred by the Sidhuism “As dejected as a hen”.

Yes it was yet another taste of failure for me in the last round of a campus interview. The second bruise by Infy was even more painful after Cognizant started the onslaught. But the day did not begin in the same note.

I woke up at 5.30 a.m with new dreams on my eyes, finished all that are routine stuff for a rational, did not take too heavy breakfast and left my home to catch the local train to reach the most nearby station of the campus interview center, in super Nirma bright and neatly ironed uniform of my college. In mid way I had to catch a packed bus and then rickshaw to reach my destination. The pre placement talk, more popular as PPT, was scheduled to start at 8.00 a.m. But being in this system for these many years I knew it will never start before 8.30 as a batsman knows Agarkar is due for a dolly or a longhop at anytime. The PPT started in the huge hall room of “Heritage Engineering College”.

All I could say about that room is that the size and glitz of that room was quite intimidating for me at that phase of my life. The amphitheatre like stands at the left side of the room or the gigantic podium where the large screen was set to show the PPT, were imposing a lot on me and my negligibility among the ocean students, coming from sixteen different engineering colleges. The theme of the PPT was marine life and all the graphs and the bar charts in the PPT were either algae’s or amoebas or something else. If Infy’s starting salary was a heavy dose of attraction for me then this very alternative theme along with Bangaluru Infosys campus shown in that PPT and were good enough to make me a citizen of utopia. I was saying to myself “Whatever God does, he does for our wellbeing, and if CTS was not in my destiny then it must be planned by the almighty like that way only. I lost the plot at the last round in CTS and the destiny has brought me here. This is the place, this is the time, show your metal honey, yes you can do that. Just do it”.

For a moment I was lost in my thoughts. May be Buddhadeb Bhattacharya’s (chief minister of West Bengal) stumbling but very affirmative way of giving speech got in to my skin for a while. When my hallucination broke I saw nobody was listening to the PPT around me. They were only concerned about the aptitude test that will commence immediately after this PPT. Those who have any idea about Infy aptitude test know two things very well. One, who the hell Shakuntala Debi is and the second is what sort of preparation you need to crack it. To my credit, I was quite well prepared and I knew there is no need to take extra pressure on myself in these death hours.

A male Infy HR was giving the PPT for us .Suddenly I heard a loud thank you from him as a huge “THANK YOU” appeared in the giant screen. I realized PPT was over. The male HR introduced us to another lady from HR who was sitting idle during this PPT session. Though she was not Barbara Mori, but she was sweet. As soon as she stood up on her hills a certain part of audience in that hall room, whistled loud and clear to welcome her as if they were sitting in a beer bar and an Item bomb has just arrived. And when others sitting around them followed the same way, I again realized, after all we are engineering students.

The aptitude started at 10.00 a.m and all the students sitting in our room found another lady in the form of our invigilator who may be having some genetic connections with Hitler. Every student in the room was so smart that they choose their best mates from their own college as their neighboring sit and sat close and tight. The slogan was “We will win as a unity, we will loose as a unity” She was smart enough to pick that trick and did not took long to apply the divide and rule policy.

After all these boring stuffs, the exam eventually started. When I got the paper, first thing I did, I smiled and then did a small Brett lee [Pushing ones right arm back in a folded manner. looking like a perfect 60 degree] under the bench as I knew all the questions and solved them many a times in last one month. The exam completed well before time for me as few in the room were struggling to follow some of the most foolish protocols set by that invigilator. In my mind, I was already planning for the HR round, my evil round. The exam was over and we submitted our papers to the Hitler. When I came out, as usual everybody was asking how the exam was and in each time I only replied fine with a smile. I went to the Canteen and found many groups sitting around different tables with anxieties and concerns written all over their faces. Though some of them were smiling but they were only smiling because they got their jobs in earlier campus interviews and came here either to give mental support to their Girl friends or just friends. I had the experience of taking lunch during a campus interview previously so I knew no matter whatever topic you discuss be it music or sports or movies it will eventually boil down to campus interview related issues. But this time it was bit different as new topics arrived like getting and not getting job, oh I am so unlucky, mock HR tests , abusive languages for the interviewer who did not pass the job etc etc as some of us tasted our big first failure. In couple of weeks I realized there was a clear cut difference in the mentality. Those who got the job are minorities here but actually living happily and the majorities are busy to blame their fates.

It was told we will get the result by 4.00 p.m. 5.00 p.m passed but there was no sign of the declaration of who is in and who is out for the HR round. I was waiting anxiously like many others .But after 6 o clock the monotonous wait at last had the better over the tension of the results.

Suddenly one senior volunteer from the host college came down and junior students, who sat in this campus interview from that very college, gobbled him up like a mob to know what is exactly happening behind the curtains. Seeing them, others who did not even belong to that college followed to enhance the perimeter of the circle and out came the verdict: “Results will be announce at 6.30 p.m” .Verdict brought many others derivatives in the from of some obvious rumors like “this college is taking so much time because they are giving undue advantages to their own students”, “cut off marks are set differently for different colleges” etc etc.

In the mid of these argy-bargies a certain mike in the college premise roared “Hallo testing hallo, silence please, we are about to announce the result of the aptitude test. We will call the names of the selected students according to their colleges in alphabetical manner. Those who are selected, should contact their Training placement officer (TPO) and rest may leave the place” .No body was ready to leave and soon pin drop silence took its reign over the arena. I knew it will take long for my college’s number as it starts with N. I was not standing like others and looking at the mike, I was sitting away from them and looking at their reactions. As the announcement started I saw many Cheerful Brett lees, Gangulys (not opening the shirt) around me. Then I saw silences and hushes of many whom I saw smiling few minutes ago, they were the faces of failures. I was desperate not to be in last league. But one reaction I saw, that will be hard to forget. I was watching a guy all these while. I did not know which college he came from. He was sitting anxiously beside a girl who could not even look at the mike. He was in a funky T-shirt and jeans denoting he had already got a job and he came for his girlfriend, the girl sitting beside him. Suddenly I heard a girl’s name being announced and there is only one verb for that couples reaction. They simply erupted in joy. The boy took that girl on his chaste and girl fell in tears. I again realized, Campus interview will not even leave college love from his grasp.

And then came my college’s number. They announced only 9 students are selected from my college for the HR round. I don’t know, but that announcement did not baffle me a lot for some reason as second name in the selected students list came in the form of this article’s writer. Many hands of congratulations, a string of hugs and series of thumbs up came to me. I reacted accordingly to all these formalities and rushed to my TPO to know where my HR round would be taking place. After getting the information I realized I need to fresh up as it’s been a long day for me. I went in to the washroom. Believe it or not the washroom changed in to a beauty parlor yes an absolute parlor. When I was just looking to put my tie in, to look a little corporate and to put some water on my face to make it fresh, I saw others were changing there shirts, putting fresh wash on their faces asking hundreds of times to their adjacent person if he was looking good or not. For the first time I found myself lacking in my preparation although I smiled seeing all these. I came out of the washroom and asked one of my friends to give his mobile. I called my father and sent him the information that I have been selected for the HR round and I will provide him further information after the ultimate result announcement. My father did not tell much, he only said be focused and asked not to collapse this time.

After a log wait my TPO came to me and asked me to go for the HR round. I steadily reached my HR interview room and there I found a boy who asked me “Are you Biswarup Ghatak?” I replied “Yes”. He held my hand and brought me to a round table as if I am his little son and recently I had learned to walk on my feet.

Like mine, there were many round tables in that room, where different HR interviews were going on. My interviewer was a well built middle aged man, with a very profound voice. He asked me to sit down and asked me to introduce myself. Introducing himself in campus interview days was more like a chanting where you shoot off in style and leave your next breath when it’s over, giving an impression we all know ourselves as clear as it gets. Then he followed it up with some tricky questions to read how strong I am mentally. I thought I tackled them quite well.

Then he asked “So Mr. Biswarup Ghatak, if Infy permits you to go anywhere in this world out of India, and give all your bearings and charges where would you like to go?”

I had no idea of racial attacks over Indians on those days so I instinctively replied “Australia”.

He said “why? Have you ever been to Australia, how do you know Australia so that it attracts you?”

I replied “No I have not. The only thing that I relate to Australia is cricket. I have been watching Australian cricket summer for quite a few years in television and the facilities that they provide their for cricket have made me a fan of this country”

He asked “What sort of Facilities?”

I replied “There are many big stadiums available in our country like down under. But in Australia I found chairs in the pavilion in different colors, which I found very correct in business perspective”

He replied “How?”

I said “When colors of all the chairs are same or there are no chairs only stands available, then it looks quite odd for a television screen in first glance, though there are good amount of spectators watching the game at the ground. It looks as if ground is quite empty and in the business point of view that is not good news. But if the chairs are having different colors then at the first glance it looks as if ground is full.”

Listening to this for a moment he paused and then said “Quite a good instant answer Biswarup, impressive”

Then again after a little pause he replied “Indian spectators will never let any sit empty if its cricket, so no point in different colors of chairs” and then he smiled.

I found patriotism in that smile.

Then again the interview started and this time it was a puzzle. Probably this is the question where I made my biggest blunder and lost whatever I gained. He asked me a puzzle from Shakuntala Devi, to make a 31 with the help of five threes. As soon as I heard the last letter s of his question, I replied “Three cube plus three plus three by three”

Sometimes you need to act before you react. And I needed a little acting at that moment. Instead I replied like a math genius which I am not and lost the plot.


The interview was over and again it was a long wait after that.

Eventually the final announcement again started at 12.15 of night and I followed whatever was doing fine for me during the previous announcement but never realized that day had actually changed. I sat exactly where I sat during previous announcement facing towards the students gathering. Again the names were announced according to the names of the colleges in alphabetical order and again I saw a string of mixed reactions. But this time reactions of joy and sorrow were about 10 times more of what it was before. As a rule of time, my college’s number came.

And this time I was not in the list.

I was not sure, what to do, what to say, who to blame, who to talk and where to go.

I sat there for 25 minutes more in hibernation. Then suddenly I realized students of my college had already left the premise and I was alone. I completely forgot to inform my result to my father and kept looking for a telephone booth coming out of the college. By that time all the shops were closed and I was completely perplexed. I had to reach home.

Suddenly I found a van going towards Rubi hospital. I picked that and came to bypass, the silent bypass of 12.45. The van left me there. I was standing alone over bypass like a fool. I was thinking may be there is no job for me or I am not good enough to get any. What would happen to me, would I always be living under my father’s restaurant? A line of the Bengali song “Hashnuhana” suddenly came in to my mind “Thami ShunShan faka Bypass e, ar hridoyer circus e, Sriti dey duo aar hashe” [I stalled over Silent bypass and in the circus of heart , my memories are booing me and laughing on me”]. Before memories laughed over me I suddenly smiled as I saw a taxi was coming my way. I asked him “will you go to Agarpara [my address]?” He said “I will only go upto belgharia”. I said ok as there was my friends’ hostel at Belgharia. I reached the hostel at belgharia by midnight and fell asleep. I was very tired. Next day I woke up and left the hostel. I came to my house. I was in a different set of a mind

My father’s first question was pretty annoying for me. When I replied he said “I don’t know, whether you really passed the aptitude test or you were doing party in the hostel. I don’t know, what’s your aim in life, whether anything is possible for you in future”

I knew bricks were bound to come as I heard from my seniors in college, how life changes during these campus interview days and how you have to accept every bouncer that is coming your way until you get a job.

Two campus interviews went by and for few days there was no sign of the third one coming my way.

Only two campus interviews changed me quite a lot. The agility that I had shown before CTS campus interview left me like water vapors. I was not smiling not reading in fact I was doing nothing. When I used to be in a sad mood, I used to listen to music, write poems or try to draw pictures. But for some reason I stayed away from them. I had beliefs really I have nothing in me.

Days were going like that way. Suddenly date of Tech Mahindra Campus interview was announced in our College. The day before of that particular date, one of my friends from the hostel called one other friend of my class and said he had already booked two matinee tickets of the Hindi movie “Gangster” for me and my friend so we should immediately leave the college and reach the hall in time. I was not in the frame of mind to watch a movie, but I could not say No as the ticket was booked.

I rushed to the hall along with my friend in our college dress and watched the movie.

I had no wishes in my mind about Gangster before watching the film. But I don’t know what happened to me after watching that movie. We came out of the hall. All my other friends were going gaga over the movie and at times they were criticizing the acting skills shown by Kangana, Shiney and Emran like true experts. But I was thinking in a different way, I was thinking who we can call as the culprit of the movie. Who we can blame for all that happened. Even I can’t blame anybody all that was happening for me. The complex angle between Simran (Kangana), Akash (Emran) and Daya (Shiney) and their fates were getting in to my mind and puzzling me. My friends in the mean time were very keen to match Kangana’s boozing capabilities and ready to try their own hands. They went into a Bar and orderd beer but I did not order any as there was a campus interview the day after. We came out of the bar and we went back to our own destinations. I reached my home in the evening.

My father asked me “Are you prepared for tomorrow?”

I firmly replied “I am always prepared, there’s nothing more to prepare”

He said “Ok, fine.”

I did not touch a single book on that night and kept thinking there was something in that movie which was yet to be explored by me. But I did not find my answer.

Next morning came. I again left for my college and this time with nothing to loose attitude. I was not at all interested about the PPT as gangster was still running in my gray matters. I never thought that much about any movie in my life. During the PPT I for the first time realized this movie plot is set for another great great song and I am the only person who could do the justice. I tried to scratch down few lines during the PPT but wrote some very ordinary silly stuff. I was very angry with myself.

Suddenly the PPT ended and the aptitude test was about to begin. I sat for the test and the paper was so easy that it was a cake walk for me.

Aptitude result was announced and I was so sure about my selection that I kept on thinking about my lyric.

Technical round came. All the questions asked to me were again easy and I answered all of them correctly and again got selected for the HR round. But who cares, now I had time in fact a lot of time to put my thoughts on my Lyric.

I started to write the lyric keeping Dayas (Shiney) point of view in mind. And this time perfect lines were coming out of my mind. I was not only writing but actually singing them. Each and every line that came out and took its place in my exercise book gave immense pleasure to me. I finished my writing and came out of the room. I drank a glass of water. My TPO suddenly came to me and said now it’s my turn and showed me the room where my HR round would be taken.

I entered the room calmly and sat down. Like a routine check up I again introduced myself. Then the interviewer followed it up with some very common interview questions. I answered them as I had prepared them.

Then he asked me the last question “Biswarup, what is the latest thing that inspired you?”

I paused for a couple of seconds and replied “It’s the Hindi movie gangster”

Interviewer’s reaction told me he was not expecting something like that. But I did not care a lot about that because I had told the truth.

He asked me “How?”

I said “Till today I never wrote any song, I only wrote poems or prose. Yesterday I saw the movie, and the movie brought the first song out of my hand. Probably it’s the best song I can ever write in my life; it gave me a feeling in the midst of so many failures that I have a future and I am having something good in myself”

He asked “can you write it for me”

I nodded and asked a paper from him and then wrote the lyric. I gave the paper back.

He read the lyric and after a while he said “well done”.

I came out of the room.

After a while, the final announcement began and I was selected for Tech mahindra being third name on the list. On that night I called my father from a booth and told him “I have got a job papa”.

3 comments:

  1. reminded me of that period when i also faced the failure at selection interview twice in a row.lost in a complete dark for 2 "long" weeks.but i was quite confident that i could prove them wrong who refused me for their company.but for this period my "GOD" (my dad) supported me and kept a deep faith that i could make out.thanks dad for this.i will never forget that till my last breath.At last cracked in TechM interview clearing all the rounds convincingly.the most awaited moment and the shy of relief came out at last and got the feeling i didnt join that so called "Educated Bengalee Jobless" group.

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  2. feeling good as an enggineering student after reading all this..your writting always paws a bundle of good impact in my mind..keep rOcKing..!!

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  3. And I thought I have read your best...this one becomes my favourite, Bishwarupda...

    Gangster is a very special movie in my mind, possibly one among the best from Bolly, and I was actually relating my story with yours. Third interview...late night bypass...the crazy things we have done before the interviews...the peer pressure...ego...losing self respect...everything reminds me of my old days...

    I should respect Tech M more than I do...but, being a selfish career-oriented freak, I dont.

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